Oh man. I quit.

The last few days have been rough. Kids have been whining and needy. Dogs an asshole. Cats pissed on the floor. Baby shit on the floor. Perfect. Baby threw a shoe and a toy into the toilet filled w/ peepee, b/c my kids don't seem to know how to flush. Hubs has been working LONG hours, so I've been on my own. I'm just not good at this mommy thing. I know that it isn't their fault, they're just kids. They do kid stuff. But I'm not right. I don't have the tolerance or patients that I need to deal w/ it. I'm empty. Time to recharge my emotional bank account. I just can't get it together over here. I'm overwhelmed w/ housework that needs to be done, and my kids, and my pets. You know how when you're already irritated about something, you start to notice all the smaller things that aren't a big deal, but become HUGE b/c you're already pissed? That's me this week. I don't like feeling like this, and I want to get over it. Why can't I pull my head out of my ass, and get on with it already? I'm lost in funkville. My kids are suffering for it.
I've had a lot on my mind this week. Maybe my funk has something to do w/ my struggle of what is it that I'm suppose to do? Or maybe not. I just know that I want to feel better. I want my house to be clean, my pets to cooperate, and to enjoy my kids, not cringe when they ask me for the 1000th time about something. I want to detach from the outside world, and hole up in my messy ass house, w/ my hubs. I'm feeling insecure too. It isn't PMS week, so I can't figure out what the deal is. Everything is just a bit too much for me these last few days. I need to insert myself in a bubble for awhile, and just be still. I need to sleep, and I need to feel loved. I haven't talked to my gf's nearly as much as normal either, and w/ my hubs working late, I've been cut off from the outside world. Yes, I just said I want to be closed off, but at the same time- eh. I'm a girl. I just hope I can work all this out in my head, like now. It used to be, when I had issues, I could have a little pep talk w/ myself, determine what I needed to make me feel better, and then I would feel relieved, and get right on making it happen the next day. I don't know what my needs are at the moment. So I guess I'll work on that for now.