About Me

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I'm a happily married mom of 3! I recently rejoined the work force after 8 years of being a SAHM. Now I'm REALLY trying to figure it out. Finding my balance w/ my family, my job, housework, school stuff, extra stuff, and maintain some sort of social life.. Nearly impossible.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Lots of Stuff

Nothing is new w/ my sister/cousin situation. We've called different labs and dna places to figure out how it all works. I think my dad is going to pay for the testing, which, might I add, is the LEAST he can do. Rotten. I think finding out is going to have to wait till after the holidays are over....

My hubs is gone :( He's off hunting. He left on Tuesday, and isn't suppose to be home until Sunday. I don't like it when he's gone- I get lonely. My gf is staying w/ me for a few nights though. Her hubs is hunting as well, so she's bunking here. Having someone here is great, not too mention the x-tra hands w/ my kids.

I had a major meltdown the other day. I don't think I've cried like that in years! I must have been stock piling or something. I worked really hard that day, busted my ass cleaning, I really went above and beyond my normal stuff. I was running all day. It was the day that hubs was leaving to go up north. Also, his birthday. I ran clear across town to pick up his favorite cake, and also his favorite meal from the grocery store. Jade was super crabby that day, constantly whining, wanting to be held. Max and Ave were picking at each other and bickering, so I was getting irritated. I wanted everything to be perfect for hubs. I had dinner on the table and ready when he came in from work, had his cake set up w/ his card, and favorite candy. The kids were hiding when he came in, and they jumped up to yell 'surprise daddy!' He was on the phone, and didn't really notice. Boooo. He sat down to eat, still on the phone. He wasn't being completely rude, at least not on purpose, but his brain was already at deer camp. Max had a program that night also, and I was a little bitter that hubs was leaving for deer camp before it, when he very well could have stayed until after. Opening day wasn't until the next morning. So what if its dark. He was excited though- blah. I didn't want to ruin it for him, so I was going w/ the flow. He was rushing around trying to get all of his shit together, meanwhile, all the kids are bitching, I need a shower, everyone is crying, and he isn't helping. I nearly cried then, but I held it back. Hubs finally made a comment about the house looking nice, and dinner being good, and thank you for the cake. He really wasn't doing anything wrong at all, it just wasn't what I had imagined happening. Anyway, I jumped in the shower quickly, then hurried to dress myself. Ofcourse, kids still crabby, hubs leaves, and I'm running late. When I get to the place for the program, I relize that I gave both my parents, and my grandma the wrong directions. They were suppose to turn the other way. S H I T. Right about then, my cell rings, its my step dad. I explained the mishap, and he didn't get it. Explain again. I'm getting Pissed! Finally, just let me talk to mom. Cell beeps. It's grandma, in her very stern, disappointed tone "NOW WHERE IN THE WORLD IS THIS PLACE!!!" I say 'sorry grandma, my mistake, you have to turn the other way" She yells over me talking "NOW YOU TOLD ME- IT WAS RIGHT BLAH BLAH"- Now I'm flippn angry and very near tears, mind you, baby is crying/screaming this whole time. So I say"I KNOW WHAT I TOLD YOU MY MISTAKE! GO THE OTHER DAMN WAY! I'M A BIT STRESSED RIGHT NOW AND CAN'T HANDLE THIS CRAP!" and click. Hung up w/o waiting for her reply, meanwhile, mom's still on the other line. Mom says"Where are you sitting, did you save us seats?!" I still in the fucking car w/ my screaming kid. UGH. Finally get to the place, find the auditorim, see my inlaws, and sit. Parents come in, flag them down, and sit again. Fucking cell phone is ringing, 3 calls in a row, grandma. I ignore it. Max has been really excited about this program for the last 3 weeks, talking about it everyday, he wouldn't even tell me what songs he was singing, he wanted it to be a surprise. Aww. It was important to him. K, lights go down, program starts, and Jade starts screaming. You've got to be kidding! Fuck me. I take Jade in the hallway to walk around a bit, max wouldn't be on till later. After 10 minutes of walking around, I pick her up to go back to the room, and wouldn't you know it, poop explosion. Poop everywhere. Dammit. Find a place to change her, which isn't easy in a ginormus high school. Girls locker room floor. I'm changing her, and the entire time, she's kicking, crying, throwing her head around. Terrible. 15 minutes later, I head back to the room. I walk up to my seat, and see my mom and grandma exchange looks and nods, like "yep, she's being a bitch" Grr. Can't I have a bad day? Don't they have days where just everything goes wrong?!?! I was very close to falling over the edge. I ask if Max is up now, and I get "You just missed him. He just walked off the stage" OH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! This was so important to him! I missed it! Ahhh! I lost it. Asked my parents to drop off max and avery off after it was over, and hustled out of there. I was bawling before I got to the car. Sobbing. Like the kind where you can't breathe, and you get the hiccups. I couldn't stop. It was awful. All of the disappointment of hubs departure, busting my ass, kids crabby, running late, bitchy grandma, exciting program, poop mess, crabby baby, all of it, and I miss it. I had body-rocking sobs for at least 35 minutes. I was soooo sad. I can't remember the last time I was that upset. All of the stuff that happened that day were small, but it was one right after the other, and I couldn't take it. After my fit was over, I felt much better. I hope that doesn't happen again anytime soon. Phew, that was rough. Since then, I've been great, and kids have been much much better.

What else?? Physco Judy girl was at the bar again this last monday. Ewwww. I did my very best to be unfriendly, w/o being flat out rude, and she finally took off. Thank Goodness. I hope to never see her again. She creeps me out. If you don't know who i'm talking about, check out my post from last tuesday- yikes.

Went out for hubs bday last weekend and had a blast! We went out for apps and a few cocktails, then headed down to the bowling alley w/ 20 of our friends. So much fun!!! We have such great friends, I'm so glad that they could be there, and help us celebrate. Hubs felt really special :)

I still haven't told you about our weekend away. I'll get to that later this week. I must go get some stuff done. My baby is STILL sleeping. That's nuts. She never ever ever sleeps this late. Its 945!! Being that my friend is here, I didn't have to get her up to take Max to school today. woot woot! Makes me paranoid still. I need to go poke my head in there. Have a good day all!

2 comments:

Distant Timbers Echo said...

Jeesh! Sorry about the breakdown. Sometimes we just have to, huh?

I know I hate it when my wife has to work very late and is gone even for one evening. I like her there... with me.

Oh well. :(
Love ya!

Jas...

CaliGirl said...

i can totally feel your pain of the day. sorry you had your melt down when you did but you never know when its going to over flow. i had one a couple years back in the middle of walmart....didnt even make it out the door. i was so embarrassed but it had to happen.

hope you are having a better today and enjoy the weekend. hubby will be home in 2 more sleeps :)

big hugs girlie