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I'm a happily married mom of 3! I recently rejoined the work force after 8 years of being a SAHM. Now I'm REALLY trying to figure it out. Finding my balance w/ my family, my job, housework, school stuff, extra stuff, and maintain some sort of social life.. Nearly impossible.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

More on Sex

Okay, so I recently read this book on sex and marriage. The guy who wrote this book is a marriage consoler, and he had some interesting theories. Hence my earlier sex poll. His theory is that the best indicator of how a marriage is doing is your sex life. Lots of sex= intimate, close nit couple. Little sex= not so great relationship. I'm trying to decide if this guy has a point, or if he's full of it. I understand that sometimes there can be circumstances where couples cannot be all that sexual, and I don't think that that would mean your relationship is on the rocks. But besides those situations, I think I would agree. Do you? I wonder how much of an impact upping your weekly average would make. I have a great relationship w/ my hubs. We on occasion have normal couple issues, but overall, we have a fantastic marriage. He's my other half and definitely my best friend, I could not "be" w/o him. I'm going to test this guy's theory. I read on Queen of Pink's blog today that she had made a decision to always be available when her hubs was in the mood, even if she wasn't (which she also said she is all about it after a few min). Kind of what this author had to say as well. What are your opinions on this? Do you think that intimacy will overall determine how fantastic your relationship is? I'm not sure that I do. Oh, and if any of you decide to try this theory, let me know what happens, and if you agree or disagree.

6 comments:

Chuck said...

To be honest I don't agree. I feel very close to my wife and I love her to death, but I'd say our sex life is about a 7.5 out of 10. Yeah, it could be better, and sometimes it is, but we're still very close and intimate without the actual constant knocking of the boots.

Cool blog. Thanks for rolling me...I'm doing the same to you!

Chicken said...

I am not sure, the ex and I only had sex 1-2 a week, and I did it only because he would nag me. I did not feel close enough to him at all to initiate it. Our sex life had nothing to do with our closeness. I did it sometimes with no feeling at all, hated every minute of it, and would sometimes get very upset. I would have hated him, even if we had sex twice a day. Mr. Perfect and I are very different. I love to be close to him. I feel closer to him, than I ever have anyone in my life. To be able to give him that part of me, is an honor. I thoroughly enjoy all of it as often as possible. And I miss it when I am unable to. But, I there have been times, when we are so busy that we go maybe 3-4 days without, and it doesn't make us any less close. I think I answered your question..right..I don't know but everyone knows my sex life now....

mistyblue3 said...

chuck- do you think it would be different if there was never sex? or only once a month sex? Sure there are times when you can't for whatever reasons, but I think what this author was talking about was a lapse of intimacy, like alot, not just for a while. And your welcome, I think you're funny as hell. And thanks!

chk- did he know you resented it? And I'm glad its fab for you now, but do you think if you went for a month w/o sex, your closeness would fade some, if a reason for the no sex was non-exsiting?

jane- thanks for your input. This is really interesting.

Margaret said...

i do not believe that A should have sex with B just because B wants it...what happened to honesty and trust and communication??? what if A is just not in the mood...i mean, life happens...and sometimes the mood isnt there...

i was with someone (who i am not with now) who would touch me even if i said that i was not in the mood...they would continue to touch my breasts, my body, anything to change me...but didnt i just say no...why cant that just be accepted and we move on??? sometimes i dont want the sex, i just want to be held...but just because i want to be held, doesnt mean that you can stick your dick in me while you are doing it...i am not in the mood for that...

does any of this make sense??? lol...

i say no means no...and be adult about it...

peace...

mistyblue3 said...

Thanks Monkey- that does make sense. Glad your not w/ that other person now, sounds like he was a creep!

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